A Worthy Cause

A Worthy Cause

Today I had the chance to watch Prodrive instructor Simon Clark improve the world a little bit, all by the power of drifting. Si’s idea was to do a sponsored drift for Red Nose Day. We had some spare track time at work, so arranged for Si to use the skid circle. When wetted the surface replicates sheet ice, so is perfect for getting your drift on.

S14 - The Fundraiser's weapon of choice

Si arrived with a red Nissan 200SX drift car which was borrowed from a mate, featuring dented panels, no interior and welded diff’, naturally. Si set off for some practice while we sorted the camera gear, the Cossie style dump valve was a treat on an overcast Wednesday morning, I can tell you.

At roughly 9.30am, Si started his stopwatch and his attempt, but an attempt at what? Well it turns out that there’s a World Record for the longest continuous drift which currently stands at 2 hours 11 minutes, obviously this was the target to aim for. With no Guinness officials in attendance, no records could be broken today, but it would be a great dry run for a possible attempt later in the year. Si got in to a good rhythm so we left him to it, it was far too cold to be stood in the middle of a windswept test track on such a grey day anyway.

A long morning of drifting lay ahead...

We returned later to find him still booting it sideways, with plenty of lock on, a great effort, given that he was still drifting two and a half hours since he began.

Si well in to the swing of things, until we distracted him

I don’t know if us turning up to cheer him on put him off though, as soon after we arrived, he spun it – ending the single continuous drift and the record attempt. 2 hours 29 minutes 52 seconds was the final time, (unofficially beating the record by over 18 minutes). After some cursing at us (sorry Si) he checked the clock and looked dead chuffed, he’d done what he set out to do. Slightly sore and needing the loo, he followed us back to the office. The final mileage covered was 43 miles, all sideways, all in a single drift, and all on only a quarter of a tank. If we hadn’t put him off, who knows how long he could have gone on for with 3/4 of a tank left??

Nervously checking the stopwatch, a new unofficial record and his fund raising done for the day

If you think this feat is worthy of a few quid, please donate here . It’s for a great cause and Si  did a brilliant job behind the wheel today.

 

Soundtrack to the greatest show on earth

The spectacle that motorsport creates is one of its main draws. Fast paced, brightly coloured, flame spitting action ignites the passions of the devout and the casual alike. Human beings like to be excited, thrilled and a little bit frightened, it make us feel alive. The visual element only goes so far, for me, sound is even more important. You’ll hear the action long before you see it, sound carries boundless distances in the right conditions. The thrill of hearing this sound approach either in a forest stage or a race track is an addictive one. Below I’ve compiled a little collection of clips that illustrate how I get my aural kicks. I could have added more, but my eardrums are beginning to blister. Enjoy…

Ferrari F50 GT -

This is one of my favourite Ferrari videos. V12s have a wonderful rich baritone note to them in most road car applications but when tuned for racing or vehicle homologation, an ear piercing wail can be extracted. It’s all about the downshifts at 1:04.

Honda Integra Type R -

While I love my drifting events, I’m not quite as au fait with all the ins and outs of JDM culture as my brother (http://drivingspecna.blogspot.com/). The two-stage bark of a Honda VTEC unit has always appealed to me. Yes they lack torque, but that’s just an excuse from people who can’t keep it in right gear. This video alleges 10,000 rpm, I don’t know if this is true or not, but frankly it doesn’t matter, you get to play at being a touring car driver on the way to the shops. It is therefore, epic.

Honda RC 166

By the 1960s, the Japanese had established themselves as a force to be reckoned with in the world of motorcycling. The Honda RC166 dominated the 250cc Grand Prix racing class, wining all ten rounds in 1966. Revving to around 18,000 rpm and generating 60bhp, the bike sang through six spine-tingling megaphone style exhausts. Surviving examples are rare and replicas hugely expensive to produce due to the level of engineering involved, it is truly one of the all time greats.

Austin Metro 6R4

The Metro 6R4 was introduced just before Group B rallying was stopped. It’s beefy, 3.0 L V6 generates a deafening wall of sound, the kind of sound that carries for miles (anyone who’s seen John Stone over Epynt in his 6R4 will testify to that). It’s got huge character and it can still embarrass newer machinery on tarmac with the right guy behind the wheel, say someone like, Kris Meeke…

BMW E30 M3

The BMW E30 M3, as I’m sure you know is a much revered and fondly remember machine. It took the world by storm in the 1980s with huge success in both Rallying and Touring Car racing. I love the hollow, metallic bark that these produce. While BMW are known for their six cylinder engines, but I think this four just screams pedigree and is always a joy to experience.

Ducati Desmosedici GP6

High revving bike engines are par for the course, however, Ducati’s Desmosedici MotoGP bike is one of those machines that comes along every so often and seems to turn everything up to eleven.  One of the most aggressive sounding engines that I’ve ever heard and a spiritual successor to Honda’s RC166

Mazda 787B

The rotary engine is a bit of a flawed gem, huge power, low weight but fragile and thirsty. It never the less sounds incredible, revving as if the engine has no inertia at all. I had the privilege to hear a rotary Group C Mazda at Silverstone a few years ago, sat in the grandstand on Pit Straight, each down shift in to the Abbey chicane was clearly audible, even over all the other Group C cars. A unique and very special car.

Porsche 997 GT3RS

I’m a sucker for 911s, yes the shear number of ‘different’ 911 variants is now getting ridiculous but I can’t help but love them. The GT3 is the one I lust after most, probably due to the fact that it’s as close to a roadgoing GT car as you’d probably ever want. No turbos to spoil the exhaust note, just a pure flat six growl that turns the M1 in to the Mulsanne Straight. You can keep your Veyrons, this would be my first choice if a long lost Prussian aunt ever left me her fortune.

Review: Need for Speed – Hot Pursuit

At the end of November, racing game fans faced a difficult choice. Both the latest instalments of the NFS and Gran Turismo games were released within a few days of eachother. Normally this would be a no brainer, NFS games have been a bit crap in recent years right? Yes, but not so with this one. Ignoring Hot Pursuit for a moment, I was tempted by GT5, I really was but after sinking hundreds of hours in to Forza 3, I honestly didn’t fancy another deep experience like that. I wanted something that was pure driving escapism.

It's not very realistic and it's all the better for it.

Graphics

HP looks an absolute treat. It might not run at a silky smooth 60fps but when you’re barrelling along at 250mph, you’re far more concerned with on coming traffic than absolute graphical fidelity. Wet tarmac is particularly well realised and when it’s lit up by lightning flashes, it evokes real atmosphere. The car models look gorgeous, there aren’t 100s of cars in this, a select 60 or so (plus police versions) but they’ve chosen well.

Yeah, it's quite pretty in paces.

Handling

This is an arcade racer through and through, so the handling isn’t what you’d call ‘authentic’. The guys behind the game, Criterion made the excellent Burnout games, so if you’ve ever played one of them, you know what to expect. 200mph+ straights in to hairpins can be negotiated with a small lift and a touch of handbrake, with the speed never dropping below 120mph. It’s silly, of course it is, but it’s also challenging and satisfying, there’s enough subtlety in the controls for you to be able to alter the angle and direction of you drift with the throttle, key to maintaining the highest speed possible.

Gameplay

The crux of Burnout, sorry, Hot Pursuit is an underlying risk/reward system. Driving towards oncoming traffic and having near misses with other happless motorists builds up a nitrous system, use this to boost engine performance when required. However, the fact you have to drive more dangerously to get this boost can make for some very tense moments when you want to eke it out for as long as possible but you know that there’s going to be a camper van in your path at some point, that you’re going to have to avoid.

The game is split in two, Cops and Racers (you get to be both). Both have events such as time trials, but the main events are always the Hot Pursuit races. These are 4 Cops v 4 Racers, the cops have to wreck all the racers to win, the racers have to escape to win. This is achieved by ramming each other off the road or using the power ups that are available. These weapons range from spike strips and turbo boosts to calling in road blocks and helicopters. You only get so many of these per race, which makes using them a tactical decision, do you keep a turbo boost in reserve for near the end of the race or use it early to grab a lead at the start? It’s these decisions that makes the gameplay so compelling

Yes, there's a Police Veyron

Sound

The engine sounds are authentic and throaty. Each race is preceded by a short clip, as the race loads of the cars blasting through the countryside, being hounded by the cops, it sounds frankly awesome. The music is varied and comes from licensed bands and DJs, but I turned it off quite quickly, I’d rather pure engine sounds, but that’s a personal preference, not a comment on the quality of the tracks.

Longevity

Even with a brilliant Online multiplayer and ‘Autolog’ results posting system, this isn’t going to last like a Forza or Gran Turismo. It’s fantastic fun but, as with all arcade racers is pretty shallow. That said, you can pick this up, only 3 weeks after release for £24 online, so you can’t really argue with that.

I whole hartedly recommend it.

 

 

Aspirational

Got to admire the DIY effort involved, or, maybe not…

Papier Mache Veyron anyone?

It just reminds me of this (which is infinitely more desirable too):

"They're driving an '84... Sheepdog"

Wales Rally GB – End of an era

Last weekend I made the trip over to Wales for the final round of the 2010 WRC. Having lived in Wales, it’s always great fun going back (the roads are frankly incredible). This trip had an added significance however. With the driver’s title already wrapped up by a certain Mr Loeb, the championship fight wasn’t the draw. Instead, the pull was the fact that this would be the last time that we see the 2.0L World Rally Car in the hands of the quickest men in the sport, for this era is now at an end.

Remember when Loeb used to just be a Tarmac specialist? Me neither.

I’m a big fan of what is to come, so I won’t lament over the ‘slowing down of the sport’. The 1600 Turbos that are on the way look the part, sound the part and still go like something off a shovel. We needn’t fear for our sport losing it’s spectacle. That said, this was the last chance that we would have the chance to see works World Rally Cars. The plan was to do all three days, to get the most bang for our buck. Tickets were bought, cheap hotels were booked, the fuel tank was brimmed. We were going.

The shape of things to come.

The stages we chose were Sweet Lamb on Friday, Fourways & Halfway on Saturday and Resolven on Sunday.

Sweet Lamb is a natural amphitheatre were you can see the cars tackle jumps, hairpins and two water splashes, the cars being visible for well over a minute. The only teeny snag was the horizontal rain that battered us on the second running of the stage. It was certainly exciting, my iPhone overloading in my pocket made my coat feel like it had anti-lag. This didn’t dampen our spirits though, the cars were spectacular over both runnings, with Petter Solberg and Jari-Matti Latvala putting on the most flamboyant displays. Loeb was in ominous form but Petter was hounding him all the way.

Henning Solberg sprays some gravel on Sweet Lamb

Kimi kept it the right way up for the whole event!

Saturday took us back to Epynt. Regular readers will know my opinion of the Epynt military range, so the chance to see two stages there on the Saturday was a no-brainer. ‘Fourways’ was the first stage, a tarmac route, but with the stage directly after, ‘Halfway’ being gravel, the cars were up on gravel springs with gravel tyres. This created a huge amount of pitch and roll under braking and acceleration, fantastic to watch. It reminded me of the Grp A era in the early 90s when suspension technology wasn’t nearly as advanced as it is today, the suspension looked like it could barley cope with the demands. The cars looked far more at home on Halfway, the full gravel setup now far more appropriate. The speed that a top level car can carry over a loose surface is breathtaking to behold.

Mads Ostberg in the Adapta Subaru. Still my favourite car of this era.

Petter lobs it in, love the comedy suspension settings.

Ken Block had a solid run out in his Focus

Resolven on the Sunday morning was an early one, first car was at 7.38am. The road to the stage was absolutely brilliant. Uphill, switchback hairpins, in amongst the trees, it was a great way to get fired up before the stage started. We spectated next to a long downhill straight, the cars were absolutely flying past. The corner at the end of the straight was a tight 90 right, comparing the braking points was fascinating. Even compared to the other top guys, Loeb was so much later on the brakes than anyone else. He has so much belief in the car, it’s a joy to behold. There’s a reason he’s a 7 time champion.

Matt Wilson did his usual thing of finishing about 7th

Very slippery surface in Resolven, Kimi did well.

Andreas Mikkelsen beat several 'World' cars in his S2000 Fabia

I think it’s fitting that Loeb won it, even though Petter pushed him on all the way. Sebastian has dominated this period of the sport so convincingly, him taking the final win was predictable, but it felt right.

I was thoroughly impressed with the running of the event. I’ve only ever marshalled on it before, so I didn’t really know what to expect as a paying customer. I’d heard tales of tiny spectator pens ruining it for some fans in years past. Either this has been addressed in recent years by the organisers or the complaints at the time were simply blown out of proportion. I found the spectator areas to be huge and well marshalled. No heavy handed bossiness, just professionalism across all three days.

The National rally boys were keen to entertain!

Looks like next year will have to be a must see as well. I can’t wait to see what the new breed of cars can do in the hands of the factory drivers.

To finish I’d just like to add my voice to those lamenting the fact that Dave and Neil Cole won’t be covering the WRC next year. I think this is a real shame, the coverage has evolved and Neil has really grown in to the role of host. They really got the balance right this year, ditching the ‘celebrity guest’ element was a very welcome move. I’ve hugely enjoyed the coverage in 2010 and I for one am quite sad that Mr Cole won’t be venturing in to this new age of rallying with us.

Zen and the art of taking the piss

A most honourable activity.

As it’s Suzuka this weekend, I thought I’d indulge my literary side and think up some topical,
F1 themed Haikus. For those of us not aware (I had to Google it), a Haiku is a Japanese verse,
formed from 3 lines. Each line has a set number of syllables, in the following order 1st line 5, 2nd line
7, third line 5. Traditionally, they are used to ‘set a scene’ but can also be used for humerous
purposes.

Below is a compilation of some of my own and the best of those that I’ve seen others do over the
last couple of days. They come from a varity of places, Twitter, Facebook and Internet Forums. Some of
them are absolutely fantastic. Enjoy.

Generic F1:

Cars go round the track
They are all quite fast aren’t they?
Time for Sunday Roast.

hot places to be
are the cars in the grand prix
bound to get sweaty

poor sad safety car
always in front, never first
he cries petrol tears

zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom
zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom
zoom, zoom, chequered flag

out lap use mirrors
you block alonso badly
grid drop your reward

pitlane is busy
lollypop man brave hero
prime or option tyre

Title Fight:

Rivals fighting hard
will it end in tears for one ?
Bernies laughing hard

it’s a five horse race
title fight not yet over
except for massa

the season draws in
the sacred F1 tarmac
who will win this time?

Suzuka:

So now to Japan
Crazy Koby for the win?
Yeah, probably not

No Jake this weekend
Lee steps up to fill his shoes
We still have Ledgard

Suzuka racing.
Flying down the straights and bends.
Cars sometimes fall off.

Rain could make this fun
Japanese grid girls: do want!
Mclaren to win!

home race for sakon
no longer stopped by poison
he’ll arrive back row

wheel on a wet kerb
petrov off spectacular
majestic gravel

spoon 130r
track has magical corners
and a ferris wheel

2010 F1 events:

Webber, head long rush
Into the first corner, oh
What a fucking tit !

Alonso complains
he is the number one guy
fans roll eyes to sky.

And this is CRUCIAL
The battle has now been joined
Thus speaketh Legard

Ferrari redness
No need for those penalties
Choc ice Kimi Fest

Slow moving Lotus
Mark Webber far too hasty
Upside down Red Bull

made with CFD
the Virgin is elegant
it’s not that fast though

shark nose no sponsors
heidfeld’s hair luxurious
can nick finish well?

neat blue and white car
rubens fancies points finish
beware of hulk smash

red bull fast again
with mighty wings and aero
good newey design

cherryblossoms fall
like Schumi down the timesheets
he has understeer

Many thanks to @racing_waiting, Emily Phillips, Emily Evans and Rllmukforum users Myoozikk,
sidewaysbob, dayte, eighthours, p1nseeker, Arc’Tan’Gent, Iron Chicken for all their
contributions.

Can you think of any?

Imitation is the highest form of flattery – Austin’s F1 Greatest Hits

Imitation is the highest form of flattery.

Yesterday the proposed layout for the new Austin F1 track was revealed. When the promoters stated a few months back that they were seeking inspiration in existing circuits, it turns out that they weren’t joking. The track seems to be a collection of corners from a ‘Greatest Hits’ album of the world’s racetracks. The diagram below highlights the sections in question. The Maggots/Becketts section could also be likened to Suzuka’s first sector and the Hockenheim and Istanbul sections are also unmistakable.

Mr Tilke has had some hits and misses in recent years, creating some hugely entertaing and challenging tracks one year (Istanbul) then turgid, precession generators (Bahrain) the next. I know the current aero regs are partly to blame, but his output has been a mixed bag. With the Austin track he seems, to my mind anyway, have struck gold as a ‘curator’ rather than a ‘creator’. What a fantastic jigsaw puzzle, taking your pick of the world’s great corners and piecing them together to form a new and unique circuit. This layout is augmented by some dramatic elevation changes, with sector 1 looking particularly spectacular thanks to a climb up to turn one with the track falling away afterwards.

It’s fun to think what other corners might have been discarded as options. Obviously the track needs to flow and remain coherent, so something like Spa’s Au Rouge leading in to Laguna Seca’s Corkscrew sounds awesome but probably wouldn’t work in practice. It’s an intriguing way to go about designing a circuit, but not one that you would want repeated too often. Stringing together these great corners does not guarantee lots of overtaking, potentially quite the opposite, but there’s enough variation for both quick, barnstorming corners and slower, overtaking places.

Overall, I’m very glad that F1 is returning to the US, it’s about time and the fact that the track looks so interesting means that 2012 could well be a year to look forward too.

BTCC Silverstone

Just a wee quick one.

I made a quick trip over to Silverstone for the Saturday of the race weekend. I couldn’t make race day and fancied a gander at Quali and the airshow that the circuit was laying on. I had a quick whistle stop tour of the Team Aon hospitality and pit garage then watched Qualifying from the Copse A & B grandstands.

Hello TC

The airshow was curtailed by the weather unfortunately. Both the Spitfire and the Vulcan had to cancel due to appalling fog in the south of the country, a real shame as I was very much looking forward to seeing the Vulcan (plane geek as well as car geek you see). The show was still good, the Yaks put on an interesting, display and the Extra 330 stunt plane was fantastic.

The Yak display team

An airborne handbrake turn.

For me the most evocative aircraft on display was the P51-D Mustang, probably the greatest single engined fighter of the second world war. The noise was wonderous, the P51 (D) used the same ‘Merlin’ engine as the Spitfire. It’s a 27L, supercharged V12 and it was spine tingling. The triumvirate of a deep, V12 roar coupled with the whine of a massive supercharger and the prop tips whistling as they went supersonic was breathtaking. I enjoyed that sentence.

I wish I could post the sound on here.

The Qualifying action was great, plenty of incident with the Fords looking imperious. So imperious in fact that due to being over 0.5s quicker than anyone else, TOCA once again reduced thier engine’s power output via a smaller air restrictor and lower turbo boost pressure.

James Nash slams on approaching Becketts.

I like qualifying days, I still maintain that they’re the best way to see F1 if you need to see it live. The atmosphere is relaxed and there’s simply more space to move about.

Matt Jackson

Full set of BTCC shots: http://www.flickr.com/photos/38587975@N00/sets/72157624658158795/

So yeah, a quick one like I said, next event will probably be Trax on 5th September. Hopefully see you then.

Some Road Racing at last!

SOME ROAD RACING, AT LAST!

Those of you who follow me on Twitter will have probably read about me going to Northern Ireland over the weekend to watch the Ulster Grand Prix. This is a huge deal for me, firstly because due to university or work commitments, I haven’t been able to get to the TT for years, and secondly because Irish Road Racing has to be seen to be believed. I went to the races with a mate, who’s family live in Tandragee, home to the renowned Tandragee 100 road race. They actually live on the same housing estate as TT legend Phillip McCallen, we drove past his house! It’s safe to say that the local community is totally integral to the running of the events, the local papers are full of info and the marshalls are locally sourced. It creates a wonderful atmosphere.

The TT and UGP are both essentially motorbikes tear arsing down closed, public roads. The distinction is that the TT is against the clock, whereas in the UGP (and other Irish road races) the riders are physically racing for position, oh and it’s mental. As at the TT, I’m always gobsmacked by the commitment on show. I think to myself, yes, they’re professional nutcases, but surely you can’t ride a 180bhp sportsbike at ten tenths down narrow B roads? But then they come screaming past, hard on the brakes, the rear wheel snaking around beneath the rider, barely kissing the tarmac, with the slipper clutch getting a battering as they stamp down the gears. Every lap is like this, even the privateers are awe inspiring in their bravery and skill.

A couple of 250s over Deer's Leap

We were stood no more than 10ft from the track at any time, getting so close is sure a rare event these days and it only adds to the thrill. We were in amongst groups of local lads (most of which were well in to their Buckfast or tins of lager by 10am) but everyone was very friendly and chatty. As you can expect, there was plenty of beautiful roadbikes lining the roads, parking where ever they could.

The lads next to us, see, Buckfast & Tinnies, good craic.

Photographic this event has a real challenge, panning needed to be incredibly quick and we were lucky with the weather being so bright so I could keep the shutter speed nice and quick. Initially, I was feeling quite cocky. On the Superstock sighting lap (race 1), I had my eye in by the time the last few bikes came though. I was feeling pretty confident as they really seemed ‘on it’ for a sighting lap. Then they came through on lap one at full tilt.

Oh. My. God.

What I thought was quick before was absolutely blown in to the weeds. The bikes were coming through so much faster, it was harder to comprehend. I had to quickly sort myself out and recalibrate, the races are only 7 laps at most, so I wouldn’t have that many opportunities to catch the top guys on camera. I’ve never panned so fast in my life, it was quite good exercise, but I probably looked a bit special while I was doing it.

My favourite rider, Guy Martin on a retro liveried Honda

Another feature that impresses about this type of racing is the variety of machines that the riders will compete on, in the same day. From 250s right up to the full fat Superbikes, some riders were very busy, but still quick in every class, incredible when the margins for error are so narrow, as you can see below, bales anyone?

Ian Hutchinson on an installation lap believe it or not!

With a sport this dangerous, there’s quite often serious accidents. This year a bike went off in the Superstock race and hit two spectators. The rider and one of the spectators are stable, with the other in a critical condition. I wish them all the best. Overall it was a brilliant event, the weather was nothing short of glorious, bar a short cloudy spell in the afternoon. The action was spectacular and cheap to watch. I got over there via BMI baby for £52 return so it can be a relatively cheap trip and I thoroughly recommend it. It will redefine what you think ‘fast’ is. Few more photos to finish? Why not, full set is here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/38587975@N00/sets/72157624611580775/

Eyes wide open!

Just stumbled across this from 2006:

Confessions of a negligent Motorcyclist

Forgive me Honda, for I have sinned.

There was a spate of ‘Automotive Confessions’ on Twitter yesterday. Most concerned people admitting to owning terrible cars or bikes, and indeed paying over the odds for said abominations. So this got me thinking, do I have any Automotive skeletons in my closet? Turns out I do, but not in terms of owning vehicles considered to be lacking in any kind of merit. My confession is one of the crippling and ultimately terminal  neglect of one of my vehicles. I’ve killed…

A little background. I passed my motorbike test in 2002 on my first bike, a Suzuki GS125 which I’d owned since I was 17. When doing your motorbike test (I think this is still the case) you can either do it on a 500cc ‘big bike’, or a 125cc. If you pass on a big bike you can then go out and buy any bike you like, without any restrictions. If you pass on a 125, like I did, you are restricted to a bike of 33bhp or less, for a period of two years. A lot of people buy a middle sized bike, like a Suzuki SV650 and fit a 33bhp restrictor, which you can then remove, once your probation is completed. I however was skint and couldn’t afford a ‘proper’ bike so I trawled the classifieds for a bike that had less than 33bhp as standard. This invariably meant, small and old if it was to be cheap. I struck gold, £290 got me a low mileage 1983 Honda CB250 RS. The RS bit sounded good so I went for it. This had 28bhp, good(ish) handling and, being a Honda single cylinder, was bulletproof. I fell in love with this bike, it felt so much faster than my 125, it would do an indicated 80 mph with one’s chin on the petrol tank. I went everywhere on it as it was my only form of transport, great times.

Exactly the same as my RS, only in much better nick

Fast forward to July 2005, I’m at the end of my 2^nd year at university and I have landed a summer placement at the Motorcycle Industry Association (MCIA) in Coventry. The MCIA is a  motorcycle industy body, involved in the promotion and safeguarding of motorcycling in the UK, great dissertation fodder. The MCIA had a pool of press bikes on hand, kindly provided by the likes of Triumph, Yamaha, Suzuki and Honda. One of my roles was to pick up a brand new, all black R6 from Yamaha UK in Weybridge. So I pootled down all the way from Coventry to pick up this bike on my little Honda which, even on the motorway, performed admirably. University meant no money, so I couldn’t upgrade from my 250, even though my two years were up.

The R6 I picked up from Yamaha UK, incredible.

I hopped on the R6 and frankly, after an intimidating start, had some of the best fun of my life on that bike, it was mental. I don’t buy in to this ’600s are for girls’ bollocks that is spouted by certain sportsbike riders, it was hilariously fast, but I digress. So, my time with the R6 came to an end, and I blasted back to Yamaha UK to drop it off and collect my RS. Compared to the R6, it felt like it was about to fall apart, even dangerous but eventually we got to know each other again. On the ride home however, it didn’t feel as powerful as I remembered. I put this down to having just gotten off a bike with roughly 90bhp more, so continued on my merry way. Just before I got on to the M25, I stopped, the bike just didn’t feel right, it was very sluggish to rev, ignoring any R6 comparisons. I unscewed the oil filler cap, which sat conviniently on the top of the crankcase. Upon doing this, little whisps of white smoke came floating out and I thought to myself, ‘ooh, that smells a bit hot’. Yes, I know, this should have rung alarm bells but as I’d never opened the filler cap on the bike when the engine was hot I didn’t see this as an issue *facepalm*

I pressed on.

Just as I passed Prodrive at Banbury on the M40, it happened. Revs dropped dramatically, BANG, then a chirp from the rear tyre as it locked, whip the clutch in and coast. It had seized. It then dawned on me, I had run the thing out of oil. I couldn’t remember the last time I had checked the oil, let alone topped it up, poor thing. I phoned a mate, who came with a van to pick me up. It was clearly destroyed, it would freewheel even when in gear, no compression owing to the massive hole that the valve punched through the top of the piston.

My dad is an automotive mechanical engineer, when I got home and told him what had happened I could tell he was ashamed. His eldest had royally knackered a bike through neglect and lazyness that would have lasted for years more. That said, let’s look at the positives, my little Honda did the thick end of 70 miles with no oil in it, now that’s build quality.

So there it is, my confession, but I’ve learnt from it. Let’s just say I’ve checked my oil levels very closely ever since.